Thursday, August 19, 2004

Creepy dreams and a strange peaceful sensation

So I had this crazy sort of random morbid dream last night that I can't shake.

I'm in a coffee house - think Friends with the comfy couches - and I'm kicking back with everyone who's ever been close to me who's now dead.  Alberto's there, my mother, my grandmother, my great grandmother, Nash (but he's asleep which was his usual state), Judy the dog, Keith's mom, Elvis (I know - random), and John Lennon and we're kicking it.  Chilling, drinking coffee, and I'm catching them up on everything they've missed since they passed away.  Like I was visiting them after a long time apart.  Elvis and John are at a separate table arguing about lyrical genius.  Elvis is having a hard time keeping up, but the lip curl has me completely mesmerized...

Alberto tells me he doesn't like my hair, that I need to leave it alone and let it heal.  My mother looks absolutely stunning, as usual.  I'll post a pic of her sometime - she was amazingly beautiful.  My grandmother wants to prepare a meal for us (and I'm craving chocolate Malt-O-Meal like crazy), but she's more concerned about my girls and my stress level (she was like the mom I never had - more of a mom than anyone else in my life ever was), and my great grandmother is cracking jokes as usual.  It was like we were all together, that I'd lost no one and things were cool.  No empty spaces in my heart whatsoever.

The kicker...Omar walks in and has a seat next to me with his iced frapuccino and we're all okay with it.  Like we were waiting on him.  He smells like cabbage and he's wearing black socks with sandals, which I despise.  I scoot around facing him and rest my legs in his lap (my normal procedure with my best friends) and we start catching up.  I've missed him so much that I give him the most enormous neck hug and he pretends to choke.  (that wretched Britney Spears song is in my head now - I guess I need you baby - make it stop) ANYWAY He needs a haircut real bad, and he's pissed I cut mine.  All is well. 

I have these dreams occasionally where people I've lost "visit" me andtell me things they think I should know.  For two years after my mother died I had dreams where she's desperately trying to either show me or tell me something and I can't understand her or can't hear her - she's always frantic.  I'm glad those don't happen often anymore. Anyway...

Most of the time I wake up terrified with a sickish feeling, but this was cool.  Peaceful even.  Kinda like waving at me, letting me know its all good up there.  What a blessing, eh?  Peace is an awesome feeling.

I dream dead people.  pfffft!

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