A few days ago, I posted a heart-felt journal entry about stuff and things that I'm going through. I honestly didn't mean to stir up as much dust as I did, but the response I received warrants a response in kind.
As many of my friends have said, our journals are for us. They can be whatever we need them to be. Journalling has become a very valuable tool for me, and serves many purposes. I can keep in touch with my friends, I can post goofy things, I can put up pics of my beautiful daughters... but the purpose behind me posting my marital issues was two-fold:
First, (and I've done this for the longest time) its helpful for me in emotionally intense situations to get things down in writing. This helps me form my thoughts, get things into perspective, and vent when communications are failing otherwise. I used to do this in letter form and throw the letters away. Now I can do it here, and get feedback. I'm one of those that truly wants to know if she's being ridiculous.
Second, sometimes we need to open things up to group. We need the "Girlfriend Factor". So no, you don't know the whole story, but it still helps to know you're here. Maybe that's a girl thing, but I love the fact that I've got people in my life who back me up.
The comment was made that perhaps people should print out their journal entries so the sig other can read them, to spark communication. Trust me, in my situation everyone knows exactly what the issues are. He knows where my journal is, he's fully aware of what's going on - these entries are for my personal edification, not to start arguments. Lord knows we've had enough of those lately. This is our space - a safe place to spew, whine, cry or goof about whatever we want.
Besides, when I open up to group I get totally awesome friends stepping in to remind me just how much I love this man and why. (Thanks Amy!)
Thank you all for the hugs and the squooge. I really really REALLY needed that.
On a totally different note...TOTALLY different, trust me.
I'm a shoe whore. I love shoes. Anyway I just bought a brand new pair of black leather boots and wore them to work and I just couldn't understand why they hurt so badly. They were tight and hard to walk in, and I was generally bummed. I walk a lot during the day, and if your shoes hurt it is not a good thing. Makes for grumpy Krisses. Bad.
Now these boots are hot, let me tell you. Black is one of my favorite colors, and these are sexy. Plus, they're semi-comfortable and look cute with jeans, AND I can wear them to work because the coordinate nicely with other stuff. (I can wear my goofy tacky socks with them too, and no one knows.)
Anyway, I digress.
So I went home, took them off, and left them for a few days. The next time I tried them on, I felt something funky inside. Turns out I never pulled out the little cardboard insert thingies they stick in there for whatever reason.
(What is that for anyway - so they don't get squished, or so they don't look dorky in the box??)
So, yes, I'm still the same goofy dorky Kris. Last year about this time I was going to work all day, attending meetings and going to class with my shirt on inside out. I also almost went to work with my shower towel on my head. (Thank you, Louie!)
This year, I'm wearing cardboard inserts in my shoes. Its all good.
Y'all can thank Louie for this entry - when I told him about the boot thing, (after he finished guffawing) he suggested I put it in my journal. So there you go.